I REALLY DUNNO WUT DA **** 2 DO...I FIND MYSELF DOWN N OUT SUMTIMEZ, WIT NO $$$, N NO1 DER DAT LUVZ ME OR KAREZ BOUT ME, NO SMOKE OR DRANK..NUFFIN...DER AINT NO JOBZ N I CANT FIND HONEST WORK EVEN IF I WANTED 2, SO IM TEMPTED WIT SINNIN 4 $$$ N RISKIN MY FREEDOM, OR LIVIN LIKE A BUM...N WHEN U HUNGRY, U FINNA DO WUT U GUTTA DO 2 EAT...REAL TALK...SO IZ DIS MY FUTURE??...DOIN CRIME 2 SURVIVE CUZ I CANT GET AN HONEST JOB N DONT NOBODY WANNA HELP ME OR KARE IF I EVEN WAKE UP 2MOR??...WUT A GREAT LIFE...I AINT SUICIDAL...IM JUZ LOOKIN 4 SUM1 2 REL8 2 ME N FEEL MY PAIN....BUT I CANT FIND NO1 1/2 AS REAL AS ME NO MATTER WHERE I LIVE...
I DONT HAVE NO FAMILY ALIVE DAT I CAN RELY OR DEPEND ON OR DAT KAREZ IF IM ALIVE OR DEAD...EVERY1 I KNO IZ LOCKD DOWN OR DEAD...ALL I GOT IZ GOD!!!...N RITE NOW HE AINT BLESSIN ME ENUFF, DATZ Y IM LOOSIN FAITH....I AINT GOT NO $$$ OR JOB OR NE1 DAT LUV ME...PPL JUZ USE ME, LIE 2 ME, STAB ME IN DA BAK, PLAY ME, ETC...ETC...BUT YET, I STILL SHOW LUV N 4GIVE...BUT DAT ISH GETZ OLD N MY HEART STARTIN 2 TURN COLD....MY FUTURE IZ GRIM...I CAN EASILY GET $$$ NOW, BUT IM WISE ENUFF 2 KNO IN A YEAR ILL B LOCKD DOWN 4 10 YEARZ N DA AMMOUNT OF $$$ I GET NOW AINT WORTH DOIN 10 YEARZ WITHOUT FREEDOM...REAL TALK!!!...
SO WUT DOEZ A **** FROM DA STREETZ WIT NO $$$ OR FAMILY DO?...HOW CAN I POSSIBLY MAKE IT N BEKUM SUCCESSFUL? I AINT TRYIN 2 SOUND NEGATIVE, DIS IZ MY LIFE N DESE R DA FACTZ....I KNO SMOKIN N DRINKIN DONT SOLVE NUFFIN, SO I AINT DOIN DAT ISH AS OFTEN, ALL I NEED IZ SUM1 2 BELIEVE IN ME N GIVE ME AN OPPORTUNITY...BUT NO1 DOEZ...NUFFIN CHANGEZ, AT LEAST 4 DA BETTER....
I AINT GOT NO1 DAT LUVZ ME BESIDEZ GOD, N RITE NOW HE AINT SHOWIN ENUFF LUV OR ELSE I WUDNT B IN DA POSITION IM IN...YADADA MEAN....I DUNNO NE1 WHO BEEN THRU AS MUCH PAIN AS ME N STILL ALIVE N BREATHIN N DIS YUNG N STILL NOT LOCKD DOWN....REAL TALK...HOW I GOT DIS FAR PROOVEZ GOD GUTTA B REAL, BUT Y MY LIFE IZ A LIVIN **** MAKEZ ME WANNA GIVE UP SUMTIMEZ....ESPECIALLY WHEN NO1 BELIEVEZ IN ME OR WANNA HELP ME N SHOW ME LUV....IM TIRED OF LIVIN IN DIS SELFISH GREEDY ENVIOUS COLD WORLD WHERE YA BEST FRIEND WILL SNITCH ON U OR KILL U 4 $$$....AINT DER NE1 I CAN TRUST N DEPEND ON, N DAT WILL TRULY LUV ME N KARE BOUT ME BESIDEZ GOD??...ONCE U GET YA HEART BROKEN ENUFF U DONT HAVE 1 DEN U TURN IN2 A COLD BLOODED ANIMAL CAPABLE OF DOIN JUZ ABOUT NETHANG DAT WILL GET U LOCKD DOWN OR KILLD...BUT WHEN U HOPELESS, U DONT HAVE NO INSPIRATION OR MOTIVATION....WHEN U DONT C NUFFIN CHANGE N NUFFIN POSITIVE, N EVERY1 U EVA KNEW SINCE U WUZ A SEED IZ LOCKD HOMELESS, LOCKD DOWN, OR DEAD N U DONT HAVE NO1 DAT LUVZ U OR NO FAMILY OR $$$, U REALLY CANT HELP BUT ME HOPELESS....SURE I GOT GOD, BUT IZ GOD FINNA PAY MY BILLZ N PUT A ROOF OVA MY HEAD N FEED ME, OR IZ ME DOIN DIRT FINNA DO IT?!?...I BEEN FAITHFUL B4, N DONT NUFFIN CHANGE...I DUNNO WUT 2 DO...
I GUTTA DECIDE WHAT I WANNA B 100%, A GANGSTER WHO ONLY DOEZ DIRT 2 SURVIVE CUZ HE DONT HAVE NO1 DER 2 HELP HIM LIKE EVERY1 ELSE, BUT STILL HAS A HEART, EVEN THO ITZ BEEN BROKEN A MILLION TIMEZ, OR A CHRIST FOLLOWER WIT LIL FAITH N HOPE LEFT...RITE NOW IM BOTH, SO IM LOYAL 2 NEITHER...RITE NOW IM LOST, I DUNNO WUT 2 DO...WHEN I NEED HELP, AINT NO1 DER 2 HELP ME, SO I QUESTION PPL'Z INTENTIONZ...IZ EVERY1 BUT GOD ONLY OUT 4 DEMSELVEZ, N IF SO, Y KEEP LIVIN WIT LUV IN A WORLD FULLA FAKEZ N PPL WHO SHOW HATE??...